


meet me in the afterglow

by chatsdelune (greymooses)



Series: 30 days of svt [28]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: 30 Days of Writing, Angst with a Happy Ending, Based on a Taylor Swift Song, Feelings, Friends With Benefits, Getting Back Together, I Made Myself Cry, M/M, i guess digging up emotions from like 8 years ago is hard wow, no actual action in here just them dealing with their shit, these tags are so confusing i'm sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-16
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:41:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27586238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greymooses/pseuds/chatsdelune
Summary: regret isn’t usually a word in mingyu’s vocabulary. but then, he doesn’t usually lose the love of his life because he couldn’t be an adult when the situation called for it.he never deleted minghao’s number.and now he’s falling-down drunk in a disgusting dive bar, being ogled by men and women alike. all he wants to do is go home. truthfully, he’s not sure where home is anymore. he has an apartment, sure, but it’s felt empty and wrong for months; dark and hollow without minghao’s exasperated but fond smile when mingyu walks into a piece of furniture or his giggles when he’s wine-tipsy — all the stupid things they let themselves do that they shouldn’t have.
Relationships: Kim Mingyu/Xu Ming Hao | The8
Series: 30 days of svt [28]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1949296
Comments: 8
Kudos: 87





	meet me in the afterglow

**Author's Note:**

> a second fic in one day? idk either. went a little off prompt for this bc i've desperately wanted to write an [afterglow](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8HxbqAsppwU) fic for SO LONG and this prompt was workable.
> 
> i've written. so much today. disclaimers about typos, continuity issues, etc. i'm not really sure if this makes sense anymore. mingyu has been said to be like. an emotional drunk so idk.
> 
> prompt: “i still have your phone number memorized even though i haven’t called you since we split and somehow i remembered it even though i’ve had like six shots of bourbon and hey i know you’re pissed that you’re here at this dingy club at 3 in the morning to pick my drunk ass up but you have to admit that’s pretty impressive”

_i pinned your hands behind your back, oh_  
_thought i had reason to attack, but no_  
_fighting with a true love is boxing with no gloves_  
_chemistry til it blows up, til there’s no us_

  


the rules were simple: no talking about their days, no random texting, no cuddling — before sex, after sex, or any other time in a way that might border on romantic — and no feelings. feelings were to be disclosed immediately, and feelings meant stopping.

they kind of fucked that last one up.

mingyu knew it was getting too serious, had a sinking feeling in his gut when minghao showed up at his door twisting the ring on his forefinger and asked if they could just talk.

_“i don’t want to do this anymore,” like a punch to the kidneys._

_“okay.”_

_“... wow.”_

_“we said nothing serious, right?”_

_“this is me saying i want it to be serious, gyu. i’m not stupid, i know you feel the same way.”_

_“i’m sorry, i don’t.”_

he did. does. making minghao believe his feelings were one-sided was one of the shittiest things he’s done in recent history. but minghao set up the rules, and then minghao broke them, and some petty, childish, afraid demon possessed mingyu to say no.

_“why are you lying about this?”_

_“why are you unwilling to accept it?”_

minghao? amazing. incredibly sexy, cutest laugh known to humankind, always growing as a person. it’s inevitable he’ll end up outgrowing mingyu, or at least he thought as much when he refused to have a conversation about having a real relationship. it was the better option for both of them.

_“you know what? fuck you,” uncharacteristically venomous._

the slam of the door rattled the framed photograph — one of his own, of a sunset, taken on a hike with seungcheol — hanging on his wall.

  


_i lived like an island, punished you with silence_  
_went off like sirens, just crying_  
_why'd i have to break what i love so much?_  
_it’s on your face, don't walk away, i need to say_

  


regret isn’t usually a word in mingyu’s vocabulary. but then, he doesn’t usually lose the love of his life because he couldn’t be an adult when the situation called for it.

he never deleted minghao’s number.

and now he’s falling-down drunk in a disgusting dive bar, being ogled by men and women alike. all he wants to do is go home. truthfully, he’s not sure where home is anymore. he has an apartment, sure, but it’s felt empty and wrong for months; dark and hollow without minghao’s exasperated but fond smile when mingyu walks into a piece of furniture or his giggles when he’s wine-tipsy — all the stupid things they let themselves do that they shouldn’t have.

the bartender asks him if he wants her to call him a cab. he shakes his head vehemently; regrets it immediately. he wrestles his phone out of his pocket and taps on the only name in his favorite contacts.

it only rings once before there’s a click, but it takes a few seconds and a heavy sigh before minghao says anything.

“how drunk are you?” he asks quietly.

mingyu probably woke him up. of course he did. minghao doesn’t go out and drink until two in the morning. even if he did, he’d never be so stupid as to call mingyu and ask for a ride home.

“little bit.” he tries to avoid slurring, but it’s hard. his eyes flood with tears and he glances up at the ceiling to try to stop them from falling. he swallows around the lump in his throat, says, “can you come get me? i don’t know who else—” a tear breaks free and slides down his cheek. he sniffles, wipes at his eyes with the cuff of his hoodie sleeve.

there are countless other people he could call. he could take a cab by himself. he could probably go to jeonghan and seokmin’s and cry on their sofa before passing out. but he doesn’t want that; only wants to see the one person he doesn’t deserve to see; has an urgent, pressing need to apologize for this call and everything else.

it feels like a year of silence, minghao’s slow breathing in his ear, before he asks, “where are you?”

  


_hey, it’s all me, in my head_  
_i’m the one who burned us down_  
_but it’s not what i meant_  
_i’m sorry that i hurt you_

  


minghao doesn’t say anything when he gets to the bar.

mingyu is slouched against the wall, staring at nothing in particular. the bartender gave him water, but it hasn’t done much to fight the alcohol being absorbed into his bloodstream. he snaps out of it when he feels a hand briefly touch his shoulder. minghao is wearing a long jacket over what mingyu thinks is pajamas, bucket hat stuffed on his head.

he looks disappointed, or sad, or both. something mingyu can’t identify when he’s as far gone as he is. tired, too. mingyu supposes that’s to be expected.

minghao sighs, ducks under his arm and leads him to his car. he deposits him in the passenger’s seat and reaches around to fasten his seatbelt, silence stifling. his hair has gotten longer since the last time mingyu saw him.

he slumps against the door once minghao closes it, hugs himself protectively and wipes at his cheeks with his sleeve again.

he doesn’t have the right to be the one crying.

mingyu inhales shakily to speak once he hears minghao’s own seat belt click, but minghao cuts him off. “it’s late and you’re trashed, mingyu. please don’t,” as quiet and controlled as he was on the phone.

“okay,” mingyu replies. he hears himself, sounds so small, absolutely hates it. he closes his eyes and counts seconds, or tries to. he loses track somewhere around seventy-two, can’t recall anything about the chunk of time between getting in the car and eventually stopping in front of his apartment building.

minghao hauls him out of the car and brings him inside, dropping him on the sofa before disappearing deeper into the apartment. he comes back with a bottle of water, painkillers, and the trash can. sets everything down and carefully pulls off mingyu’s boots.

“thanks,” mingyu mumbles. tears won’t stop trickling down his face. it’s so damn annoying.

“it was a one-time thing, gyu. i can’t do it again.”

mingyu doesn’t know if he means picking him up at the bar or loving him.

“i know. ‘m sorry.”

sorry for calling him, sorry for being an idiot, sorry for lying, sorry for being scared.

minghao looks at him like he wants to say something. he apparently changes his mind at the last minute, turns and leaves instead.

  


_i don’t wanna do, i don’t wanna do this to you_  
_i don’t wanna lose, i don’t wanna lose this with you_  
_i need to say, hey, it's all me, just don't go_  
_meet me in the afterglow_

  


drinking heavily always seems like a good idea, and then the hangover happens. his eyes are swollen, his throat is dry, and he smells disgusting. he’s going to have to steam clean the sofa.

he drags himself in and out of the shower, goes about moving the trash can and medicine back to their places with a towel slung around his waist. he’s about to stick instant rice in the microwave when there’s a knock on his door.

mingyu wonders if he’s dreaming when he sees minghao through the peephole in the door. he cracks it open, staying behind it, and says, “i’m only wearing a towel.”

minghao clears his throat. “i’ve seen you in less. i have breakfast.”

he opens the door the rest of the way, exchanges barely-there smiles with minghao before he goes to his room to put on actual clothes. minghao has set everything out on the kitchen table by the time he returns. hangover food for mingyu, normal food for himself.

“how are you feeling?”

“not great,” mingyu answers. he stares at his plate. “about anything.”

minghao inhales deeply, like he’s been holding his breath. “you wanted to say something in the car last night. do you remember what it was?”

he doesn’t, not specifically, but he can guess. he’s been thinking some variation of the same thing since the second minghao walked out on him, replaying all the better ways he could’ve handled the situation as he straightened his photograph that was disturbed by the slamming door.

“i’m sorry about what happened with us. i wasn’t fair to you.”

minghao pokes at his food. he hasn’t eaten anything. mingyu almost thinks he brought it to have an excuse to stay.

“no, you weren’t.”

“it was never about not loving you. i miss you every fucking day.” minghao’s breathing hitches. “you’re one of the best people i’ve ever known,” mingyu continues, “but you change and grow all the time. i wouldn’t be able to handle it if you ever outgrew me.”

minghao raises his head, locks eyes with him, is dead serious when he says, “a plant can’t grow larger than the sun, gyu.”

“it would be cool if it could. i’d definitely want to live on a sunflower planet.”

minghao smiles at him. finally. “of course you would.”

it’s like some of the weight that’s been hanging in the air of his apartment lifts in an instant.

“are you seeing anyone?” mingyu asks, after taking a few bites of food. he looks up and finds minghao watching him.

“i’m not,” he replies, staring him down. “kind of still in love with you.”

mingyu sort of assumed that was the case, but it still surprises him. “what do i need to do to get another shot?”

minghao raises his eyebrows — a challenge. “i don’t know, mingyu. how much groveling do you think i deserve?”

“more than you’ve gotten.”

“agreed.”

“i love you,” mingyu assures him. “i’ll spend five minutes a day telling you how much if you let me take you to dinner.”

minghao smiles at him. he has no idea where he got the idea that mingyu is the sun in this relationship.

“dinner is a good start.”

**Author's Note:**

> i need to just stop writing a/n bc i will Always find something to complain about with my own writing. like the ending! hahaha i'm so tired of writing them truly. y'all are very nice though thank you. <3


End file.
